Posts Tagged ‘tactical vest’
By the looks of it, we have all survived the Mayan Apocalypse without any problems, so now we can all go back to waiting for our favorite world ending event; the zombie apocalypse! With everyone’s favorite zombie show, The Walking Dead, off the air until February, we thought we would give you your zombie fix with a list products to complete your zombie apocalypse survival kit and make you the ultimate zombie killing machine.
To start out the list, we all know that everyone imagines themselves looking like a bad a$$ when the zombies rise ( myself included), so you need to have the perfect zombie apocalypse outfit on hand. A basic military BDU pant is a good choice due to the functional design, including several pockets to store your extra ammo. Don’t worry ladies, these pants also come in pink camo so you can still have a touch of femininity during the zombie invasion. A tactical vest is also a smart choice. All of the pouches allow you to keep all of your gear close to your body and easy to access. Throw on a moisture wicking t-shirt on underneath and you’ll be good to go. Another great option would also be a leather jacket. Tough and durable, leather may help prevent biters from getting to your skin. What you have on your feet is also important. I suggest a tall leather boot.
As far as zombie weapons and zombie tools, guns are typically the most efficient, but not everyone has access to guns and some do not even want guns in their house. So here are some creative, yet effective alternatives. The Parang Machete is a great choice for those of you who don’t mind getting close to the walkers. The ergonomic handle has a comfortable, textured grip so the chance of slippage when your swinging the machete through the air is greatly reduced. The SOG Tomahawk is also perfect to have during the rise of the dead. Not only can it be used to destroy zombies, it can be used for other purposes like chopping wood and it can be attached to your belt.
In addition to all of these items, Harry’s also has a number of survival items like food and water rations, first aid kits, emergency blankets, and more that are all practical items to have around the house in case of a more likely emergency, but would still be great to have in case of the zombie invasion.
All of these items will help make you look like and feel like the ultimate zombie killing bad a$$, but it’s up to you to summon your inner warrior to get the job done.
By now, many of you have heard about Siri, the “automated” voice assistant that is integrated with Apple’s new iPhone operating system. Well, if you’ve ever seen Terminator, you already know that this seemingly innocuous Siri is nothing short of Skynet. Think about it, she’s there living inside your iPhone, watching, learning and biding her time before she brings about the Apple android apocalypse.
With the prevalence of iPhones and iPads, the Apple’s Siri will ensure that our lives will never be the same. Basically, the singularity is here, human governments will soon fall and all we can really do is protect our own assets.
If you’re gonna fight, you’ve got to have the right gear…right? We at Harry’s Army Surplus have prepared a list of the best survival gear to protect you when judgement day comes. We hope you enjoy it and we’ll see you on the other side. God save the queen!
Best Gear for the Siri’s iPhone Apocalypse:
1. Army Type Sawback Machete:
The blade on this machete is well balanced. You can hack through the underbrush in order to sneak up on the enemy and with a wide enough swing, you could probably lop off the heads of Skynet’s (aka Siri) minions. The saw back on this machete might be useful for hacking through a twist of wires in case you have to disable any nuclear warheads.
2. Leatherman MUT Military Utility Tool
This isn’t just a Multitool, it’s a soldier’s tool box. The Leatherman MUT has specific tools designed to maintain AR-15′s and SKS’s, including a bolt overide tool to grab the leading edge of a bolt carrier and allow the shooter to easily pull back the bolt in order to clear a jammed casing, allowing the user to quickly un-jam a weapon and get back to killing that army of cyborgs.
3. Basic Issue Combat Shirt
Rather than wearing some stuffy old military BDU or ACU, you’ll want one of these new fangled combat shirts. It’s lightweight, moisture wicking, breathable and fits under a tactical vest. If the Machines blast you with a flame thrower, you’ll be happy to be wearing a combat shirt with a 230 degree melting point. On top of that, chicks dig em.
4. Inforce Four Force Tactical Light
The future is murky and you’ll need a great light to lead the way as you crawl through dark tunnels and through the backcountry in your pursuit of safe harbor from your Apple adversary. With a woppin’ 300 lumens and strobe functionality to disorient the enemy, this flashlight just might save your life when Siri comes for you.
5. Cross Draw Tactical Vest
You’ve gotta have your gear at hand when Siri comes. This tactical vest holds your gun, ammo and all the rest of your essentials.
6. Solar & Wind-up Radio
Of course you need a radio in a survival situation. When the power grid’s taken down and you’re hold up in your dank bunker just south of hell, you’ll welcome the sweet sounds of another human voice being broadcast to all those resistance fighters just like yourself. Just give this crank radio a whirl or leave it sitting in the sun and POOF, instant sanity.
There are definitely more items you’ll need to survive the iPhone apocalypse and we’ll be right here helping you find the right gear. For now, we hope that this’ll get you started on your bug out bag.
For all of you who’ve had a good laugh at this article, please take note: Siri, Apple’s evil artificial intelligence, is no laughing matter. Don’t be surprised when you look down and notice that your iPhone is shooting a laser beam straight through your leg and Siri’s evil voice is telling you to submit yourself for registration at her internment camp in Cupertino California where you’ll be processed and put to work.
Long live the resistance! Down with the iPhone!